How to overcome fornication and adultery. How to deal with prodigal passion

The Monk John the Long-suffering is one of the most amazing saints resting in the Near Caves of the Kiev-Pechersk Lavra.

He is amazing in that he stood face to face against the passion from which Scripture calls to flee. “Flee fornication” (1 Corinthians 6:18), wrote the Apostle Paul. And following the chief apostle, patristic experience also gives advice regarding this sin: run. Run from the source of temptation, run from impure thoughts.

One of the saints said that fornication is a passion that cannot be looked into the eyes. And indeed, of all the feats that the saints lifted, the most terrible in their torment were generated precisely by the struggle against fornication. Remembered today, Rev. John the Long-suffering, fighting with fornication thoughts, buried himself up to his chest in the ground, so that the lower part of the body festered and swarmed with worms. Rev. Martinian (Caesarea), enduring the temptation of a harlot, entered the flames of the fire and stood there until he was burned half to death. Rev. Mary of Egypt endured unbearable suffering for 17 years in a lifeless desert so that the spirit of fornication departed from her. Another ascetic, mentioned in the Fatherland, smeared his clothes with the pus of a decomposed corpse and walked around in it until God healed him of fornication.

Direct struggle with this passion is terrible. Are you sure you can handle it? If not, then you better run. Run from where you are tempted, run from the one who tempts you. This is what the fearless Paul says, this is what the vision of the universal infection with this passion suggests.

A prodigal demon will not be driven away by any, even the most skillful doctor.

Paul also remarks, "every sin a man commits is outside the body, but a fornicator sins against his own body" (1 Corinthians 6:18). Indeed, fornication leads a relatively small family of sins, which in themselves carry punishment - not only the soul, but also the body of a person is destroyed. Such is the drunkenness that turns a blossoming man into a trembling insect. Such is drug addiction, drinking all the vital juices from the body. Such is gluttony, because of which the flesh rages. But fornication is worse than them, because it is not cured by human means. A prodigal demon will not be driven away by any, even the most skillful doctor. Only when Christ and His Most Pure Mother come between a person and his passion will it become easier for a person. But even at the same time, the cunning and terrible demon of fornication will not go away completely, but will only wait for an opportunity.

By the way, according to the Apostle Paul, it is impossible to write about fornication. “Fornication and all uncleanness and covetousness should not even be named among you, as befits saints” (Eph. 5:3), said Paul. How far are we today from these words! In our confessions, the mentioned sin is rarely not heard, with the addition of the word “mental”. But, at the same time, there is a positive side to our deplorable state. For repentant harlots, Christ promises a better fate than for high priests (Mt. 21:31).

Fornication takes away the kingdom of God from a person

If Paul had lived in our time, then perhaps he would not have written so categorically that only in fornication does a person sin directly against the body. Modern scientists (believers) say that any passion (even one that seems absolutely spiritual) has a destructive effect on the body.

For example, pride is a common companion of psychopathy, schizophrenia, and spinal diseases. Despondency acts as a catalyst for depressive neuroses and psychoses, diseases of the kidneys, the immune system, and oncology. Vanity contributes to diseases of the cardiovascular system and neuropsychiatric ailments. Covetousness and envy are associated with neuropsychiatric disorders. Anger affects the development of hypertension, coronary heart disease, angina pectoris, myocardial infarction, strokes, urolithiasis and cholelithiasis, neurasthenia, psychopathy, epilepsy*...

Yes, every passion kills a person, but fornication is still worse. He takes away the Kingdom of God from man. “Do not be deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor
adulterers, nor malakis, nor sodomists... - they shall not inherit the Kingdom of God" (1 Corinthians 6:9-10).

Fornication destroys the personality from within and attacks the highest powers of the soul - mind and will. Surprising as it may seem, but fornication is capable of clouding even the greatest mental abilities, turning the most intelligent and well-read person into a laughing stock. The mysterious connection between heresy and fornication is quite accurately indicated by the Wise Solomon. “The excitement of lust corrupts the mind” (Wisdom 4:12), wrote the wisest of people. Perhaps that is why many heretics were pronounced fornicators.

Fornication drives the Holy Spirit out of a person, turning the temple of his heart into an idol's temple. The one who surrenders to fornication capitulates to all other passions, turning into a toy of unclean spirits and his own enraged nature. How devastating the consequences of fornication can be seen in the very rigidity of the struggle against it by those who were once committed to it. Let us again remember Mary of Egypt and her incomprehensible spiritual warfare in the wilderness. This is a struggle on the verge of life and death, tension to the extreme limit of human strength. Because the war is waged here with the prince of this world himself. It is not for nothing that on the frescoes of ordeals depicted at the entrance to the Near Caves of the Kiev-Pechersk Lavra, the ordeal of fornication is headed by Satan himself - he differs from other demons by a red mantle, a parody of royal dignity. The devil personally oversees the passion of fornication, this is his favorite sphere of influence. And here his world power is growing from year to year.

Run, don't test yourself

Fornication today has a very different arsenal of weapons than it did in Paul's time. Fornication attacks modern man from all sides. It penetrates through the eyes - which is helped by a computer monitor, a TV screen and the usual shamelessness of a feral European who goes out into the street half-dressed. Fornication pours in through the ears - a depraved song, a vulgar anecdote, an indecent joke. Fornication enters through the nostrils - special spirits that excite human flesh. Fornication lies in wait at every step, because they speak and sing about it with delight, write apologies in its honor, film it, photograph it, draw it. Therefore, Paul is a thousand times right when he says: Flee fornication. Run, do not test your strength and do not tempt God. Don't play with Leviathan. Don't put your hand in the lion's cage. Be afraid to fall - who knows if you'll rise?

Let's shut up on this. This is not a topic that is useful to talk about a lot. The danger is obvious, and vigilance must be proportionate to the threat of a fall. Saint John, help. Our holy venerable fathers of the Kiev Caves, pray to God for us. Lord, save Your people from all the diseases of this world.

* About this - in the book by Irina Siluyanova "Anthropology of the disease", the chapter "Variety of forms of "unihabitation" of the soul and body."

The difference in the consent of thoughts and the bowing of the will

Saint Macarius instructed that it is impossible to avoid carnal warfare, but one must have a distinction:

"It is impossible not to feel the battle, but it is necessary to have a difference - in the consent of thoughts and the bowing of the will."

Cause of prodigal warfare

Saint Macarius explained that, in addition to natural causes, the cause of prodigal warfare is pride:

“Attribute victory to the help of God; and the reason for the impulse is pride, which you often do not notice behind you.

All Optina Elders spoke about the fact that thoughts of fornication often follow thoughts of vanity and exaltation.

Saint Ambrose wrote:

“After vanity, thoughts and veneration always follow.”

“You are greatly overcome by vanity, which is why the Lord allowed such a strong battle. You are proud, vain, envious, judgmental, all this strengthens voluptuousness, and as long as you do not humble yourself, scolding cannot decrease. With this strong scolding, you are so proud - what would happen if you were free? And the hand would not reach you!

"Fornication and fear are allowed for our pride."

How to deal with prodigal passion

Saint Macarius, in a letter to a spiritual child, instructed:

« You complain about the scolding that the objects around you help, and you ask for my instruction. What can I say to you and what will I say?

Tokmo then: resort to the Lord, who is able to keep you in the furnace of this flame unscorched, as he kept the three youths in the cave of Babylon and Daniel in the lions' den. Have a good intention to preserve the lamp of purity from the winds of the spirits of wickedness. Offer your weakness before the Lord, as the holy fathers teach us: “Have mercy on me, Lord, for I am weak” (Ps. 6:3). Move away from yourself, the tree in your strength, objects that excite scolding in you.

Call also on our Most Pure Intercessor Mother of God, a strong and quick Helper in existing troubles; also Thomais the martyr, John the Long-suffering, Moses Ugrin and others, who fought against the flesh and defeated it. Read in the fatherly books about this battle: St. John of the Ladder, word 15, St. Cassian the Roman, Nil of Sorsk and others, and the Lord will help you.

Saint Ambrose taught to pray correctly when attacked by fornication thoughts:

“Pray like this: “Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me a sinner…” Hit the word "sinful"... Remember the sins with which you offended the Lord, and humble yourself. If you can’t reconcile yourself, but “virtues” creep into your mind, say this: “Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me a sinner. Oh, indecent slave! Behold yours and your former prodigal confusions!” And now again: “Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.”

The elder recalled the power of the sign of the cross:

“Be baptized as often as possible. As you make the sign of the cross, remember and feel that you are protected by the power of the Crucified. When you sit in a cell alone, be baptized constantly; having your hands free, especially depict the sign of the cross on yourself. From time to time leave the matter, make a few bows and again get down to business. Be baptized sometimes in front of others; if they ask: why? - Say: "So you like it."

Saint Ambrose also warned:

"Beware of touch ... it excites passion and obscene movements, it is not good and very harmful ..."

The Monk Anatoly (Zertsalov) taught:

"Reproach yourself and try not to look at the tempter - and the temptation will pass."

“Means from prodigal thoughts: humility, self-reproach, abstinence, and most of all, love for neighbors: weak, infirm, sick, sisters captivated by passions.”

Saint Joseph instructed to refrain from ridicule and impure thoughts:

“Impure thoughts and imaginations come from dreams. Also refrain from jokes and ridicule - and passions rise from them.

“The 90th psalm “Alive in the help of the Most High” is useful to read three times a day: in the morning, at noon and in the evening. At noon, the prodigal demon especially attacks a person, the same psalm drives him far away.

Purity is returned by repentance

Saint Nikon reminded us that purity is returned through repentance: With the Lord, everything is possible:

“... Here is no longer an ulcer, not a disease, this is not a scab, but the whole person is stricken with a disease - sin. An ordinary doctor can no longer heal, but only the Lord resurrects with His touch: maiden, arise! And virginity returns, as with Mary of Egypt, with the gospel harlot, and with others ... All things are possible for the Lord.”

Be careful until death

The Monk Leo, in response to a letter from his spiritual daughter that she felt a weakening of passions, replied that this rest from passions bestows the grace of God through God's mercy, otherwise hardly anyone could keep himself in integrity:

“The universal enemy is the devil, always using his battles and intrigues, deceives and defeats us with such malicious and insidious tricks; and do not be convinced that rage and carnal passion are completely extinguished in you; but is it possible for you to rest for a while?

And it is not the enemy who teaches this weakness, but by the mercy of God His grace invisibly, for the prayers of the father and mothers, helps; for if it were not for God's grace to invisibly protect and strengthen, then hardly anyone would be able to keep himself in integrity.

Saint Joseph taught to beware and be careful until death:

“Against the prodigal passion, one must be careful even to death, as the holy fathers write.”

Our venerable fathers, Optina elders, pray to God for us sinners!

Sexual desire that arises at a primitive biological level is usually called lust (in the language of psychology, sexual drive). A desire that has received its realization in specific actions and gone out of control of the mind, which has become obsessive, can be called sexual addiction (fornication). This includes not only masturbation, but also just reading relevant literature, watching pornography and other activities associated with sexual arousal outside of marriage. From the point of view of the Bible and Church Tradition, all this is certainly the sins of impurity, with numerous subdivisions. We will dwell in more detail on masturbation, as one of the most common forms of sexual behavior that underlies all other types and forms of sin in the field of sex.

In adolescence, masturbation is physiologically usually associated with an excess of semen and hormonal processes, and from the point of view of psychology, it falls on the narcissistic period of personality development, when a teenager's love is directed at himself. If masturbation has not become an addiction, it usually disappears after the age of 20 in boys, and in girls it can last up to 40 years.

Unfortunately, today the opinion is spreading that masturbation is a completely normal phenomenon, there are publications promoting it. Apart from the sinfulness of this phenomenon, these articles are silent about the fact that masturbation associated with pornography usually leads to a decrease in sexual desires and, as a result, discontent of spouses, reduces the creative activity of the individual and often leads to a guilt complex and depression. Compulsive masturbation (i.e., addictive) is reflected even in the physical condition of the individual, including his appearance. In the case of struggle with homosexuality, masturbation serves as a powerful anchor that tenaciously keeps its owner on a leash of unwanted feelings. I would not like to dwell here in more detail, since some readers know this from their own experience.

We will talk about a situation where masturbation has become an addiction, and a person constantly turns to this practice, cannot refuse it. First, we will consider the reasons for this behavior, then we will look at the mechanism for the development of dependence, and finally, we will determine possible ways out of the situation.

What exactly is masturbation

Many people notice that the desire to get sexual satisfaction in the wrong way (outside of marriage) arises precisely when we are upset about something, not confident in ourselves and afraid of failure in the future (anxiety), offended by someone, or simply physically exhausted. Some resort to masturbation simply out of boredom and self-pity. Some use masturbation when they really want deep intimacy with someone (and not even physical, but just to be together), but this desire, sometimes not obvious even to the person himself, remains unsatisfied. Often, compulsive sex, in principle, is a consequence of psychological and sexual trauma suffered in childhood, some kind of protective reaction to all forms of stress.

All the situations described above show one thing: a person resorts to this practice when his soul feels bad, and in this way he tries to give himself at least a little relief, to make up for or replace what he lacks.

However, it happens that the desire to turn to this is also associated with general intemperance, with an idle lifestyle, with the absence of what in the language of ascetics is called sobriety.

Why Masturbation Becomes a Problem

The problem, however, is that physical pleasure cannot replace a peaceful state of mind; after such behavior, a person tends to feel shame and guilt. To one psychological pain, he adds another. And then more and more.

As you can see, many of the problems that provoke unclean behavior are related to the fact that a person does not feel very confident in society. Indulging his passion, he begins to shun people even more, fearing that someone will find out about it. Relationships deteriorate even further. He does not understand that it is the "easy solution" to masturbation that alienates him from his friends and makes him suffer even more. Finally, a person simply withdraws into himself and no longer believes that someone wants to sincerely help him. He literally becomes a "slave of sin." The circle closes. Such is the development of other sins connected with the sexual sphere.

The most terrible thing is that gross physical pleasure, not sanctified by the marriage union of love, removes us from God. He who has saturated his soul with prodigal images either does not feel the need for God, or is afraid to turn to Him in his sin, or does not believe that such turning will have a result. Often, he simply does not have the physical strength left to stand up for prayer.

Why does a person turn to this over and over again?

In a psychological sense, masturbation allows you to distract yourself from any thoughts at all and indulge in feelings, sensations, and thus, indeed, for some time blocks the realization that a person has problems. Thus, masturbation does provide temporary relief in the form of detachment from reality.

At the same time, orgasm brings a very great physical pleasure. The effect occurs due to the fact that the biochemistry of the brain changes during sexual intercourse, and a person feels pleasure and euphoria. These biochemical changes rearrange the structure of the connections of the neocortex, and a person literally gets used to living with other brains. Prolonged lack of sexual pleasure, as well as the absence of drugs, causes discomfort. Therefore, moving away from impure practices can be difficult.

How to get rid of impurity

Sin is not in defilement - this is a consequence, but in laziness, condemnation, pride, carelessness.
Hieromonk Vasily, New Martyr of Optina

Only if there is a memory of God in the heart of a person, if the Holy Spirit lives in him, if Christian love has taken the place of lust, there will be no place for any sin. Therefore, we must no longer seek purity in itself, but seek God, His Presence, kindling faith, comforting hope, achieving love. Let us add, to seek in the Church, where there are centuries-old methods of struggle with passions, and where the Savior of the world, Christ, is really present and active.

Purity of heart, acquisition of the Holy Spirit, active Christian love are, rather, the goals and results of life, but in the beginning a struggle is needed. At the same time, we must remember that on our own we can only control behavior, but we are not able to eliminate the desire itself. In affirming this, we immediately avoid two extremes: to believe that nothing depends on us, that we are doomed to sin, and also to believe that we ourselves, without the help of God, can succeed in freeing ourselves from this dependence and acquiring purity in thoughts.

Accordingly, we will offer here some specific tips for dealing with unclean practices (these tips can be applied to other forms of addiction - food, drug, entertainment addiction, etc.)

1. For those who have at least a little faith, it is necessary to start the fight against impurity by limiting their desires and forcing themselves to live with God. Let us point out the need for humble prayer for the purification of the heart, for God's help in the fight against this sin, accompanied by a confession of one's own impotence. The usual ascetic means help: abstinence in food and drink, curbing the gaze, restriction in sleep, combined with prayer and reading the Scriptures, but the constant memory of death and the humble patience of troubles and personal insults are especially helpful. A person who is constantly busy cleaning his conscience with tears of repentance simply does not stop thinking about pleasure. The effectiveness of these decisions is evidenced by the experience of the fight against the fornication of the ascetics of the Church.

2. Often passionate thoughts (fantasies) originate in our past. And here you just need to ask God to show us not only the pleasure that we received last time, but also the pangs of conscience with which it was connected - to show the past without embellishment, in a real light. In fact, sometimes a serious examination of the traumas of the past is required. In the literature, there are descriptions of cases when a person who worked through violence in childhood, repented himself and forgave the offenders, got rid of many unclean practices.

3. We have already said that often masturbation is associated with anxiety and depression, and here the best remedy is to become an optimist. But let this not be the superficial optimism of popular psychology, but the optimism suffered in prayer, based on an unshakable confidence in God and His love. We must understand that suffering and sacrifice are necessary for our growth, learn to accept adversity as the will of God, as His care for us, thank God more often and praise His mercy, and believe that "everything works for our good." Actually, this is the Christian virtue of hope. Saint Ignatius Bryanchaninov notes that the monks of antiquity used the following short prayer appeals to combat sadness: “Glory to God for everything”, “Lord, I surrender to Your holy will and be with me Your will”, “Lord, I thank You for everything that You please send to me”, “Worthy according to my deeds I will accept: remember me, Lord, in Your Kingdom.” In cases of incitement to impurity, you need to pray not that the Lord does not allow to sin, but that you accept this alarming situation with humility and calm down, then the desire will disappear. It should be remembered that sexual acting out can relieve pain, but only Christ can remove it. Some authors recommend using humor to ridicule the sad thoughts that arise, however, it seems that it would be no less effective to simply sincerely pray a simple prayer, read the canon or the Psalter. There is one piece of advice in Mario Bergner's book that helped him personally: "When you feel the urge to do this, fall on your knees and pray instead." Mario went into the bedroom, lay down - desires came, he jumped out of bed and prayed. Several times a night. Dozens of times a week. But soon he acquired the skill to pray and got rid of this passion.

4. We also need regular Confession with a permanent confessor, if possible accompanied by Communion. Revealing one's sins to another person protects the heart from coarsening, and an experienced look from the side helps to better understand how to deal with passions. In addition, we believe that the Lord Himself forgives sins in the Sacrament of Confession, and the Communion of His Body and Blood renews us and makes us like God, gives us strength for struggle and victory. In general, a serious spiritual life over time completely transforms a person from the inside, which is reflected in the external appearance.

5. When we fill our lives with activity, fill our needs: we will do what we love, we will lead a more fulfilling life in terms of communicating with healthy and spiritual people (primarily our loved ones), we will go in for sports so as not to envy others and improve our physical the state when we will move from fixation on ourselves, on our pleasure to life for the sake of others, and we will put the thirst for God in the place of the idol of pleasure - we will be able to control this passion.

6. If we talk about the purely technical side of the issue, then you need to find attraction activators and cut yourself off from sources of temptation: pornography in all its forms, fetishes, incl. own body (for example, in front of a mirror or in the bathroom), associative components - gifts, music, places, memorable dates. You need to understand what situations provoke this addiction, and try to change the structure of your life in such a way as to get rid of provoking situations (for example, change the daily routine or the schedule of the working week). not get into disturbing situations that provoke acting out. It is necessary to impose restrictions on the use of alcohol, because it is in a state of intoxication that it is more difficult for a person to control his feelings, and alcoholism itself only deepens depression. However, it should be borne in mind here that the rejection of sin-provoking things is not a complete solution to the issue. It is necessary to change consciousness and life - then these hooks will not hook us.

7. A decisive step is always required for complete liberation. As long as we at least theoretically admit the place of this passion in our hearts, it will not go away. It is necessary to be filled with firm determination to leave passion, even to be angry with it - how much you can torment us - and it will run away from us. Real repentance does not presuppose lukewarmness, but the real horror of sin and anger at passion, the will to leave it once and for all.

How to deal with bad thoughts (thoughts)

Properly organized work, as ascetic experience testifies, makes it possible to achieve results in six months. However, purity of thoughts cannot be acquired with the help of psychology or asceticism: “However, we must know that at least we observed all the severity of abstinence, namely: hunger, thirst, vigil, constant labor, and with unremitting zeal were engaged in reading; however, by means of these ascetics we cannot acquire a permanent purity of chastity, if, constantly exercising in them, we do not realize, by the guidance of experience, that purity is given by the mercy of the grace of God. Let everyone know that he must indefatigably exercise in these ascetic labors only in order that, for the sake of their sorrow, having bowed down the mercy of God, he may be worthy, by a divine gift, to be freed from the war of the flesh and the dominion of the prevailing passions” (St. John Cassian the Roman). Not by labor, but by humility, a person bows God to himself, it is important to remember this.

Nevertheless, in the process of spiritual growth, even to the grave, thoughts can and most likely will arise, as many ascetics testify to this. And therefore in the Church there is an experience of a concrete struggle with thoughts. First of all, thoughts must be opposed by a combination of unceasing prayer, reading and bodily labor, reflection on the texts of Holy Scripture. A frivolous attitude to morning or evening prayer often leads to intensification of thoughts. For concentration during the day, you can use listening to audio recordings of Orthodox chants, the Psalter. The unceasing Jesus Prayer, according to the experience of the ascetics of the Church, gradually renews the consciousness and heart of a person, heals his spiritual distress.

Impure thoughts must be cut off at the very beginning of their occurrence, simply do not even pay attention to them, not allowing an interview, let alone enjoying them. It is co-pleasure, weak-willed submission to thought that gives rise to despondency. Staying in such a state for a long time without opening thoughts to the spiritual father is a big mistake, because this is a direct path to insensitivity and despair. And he who despairs destroys himself, as St. John of the Ladder. In the stories about the life of the first monks, there is a mention of how one monk approached his elder eleven times with a confession of thought, before his passion left him.

Sometimes one should pay attention to the origin of a prodigal thought: whether it is born from within, from the imagination, or comes from outside, from sight and meetings with certain people. In the first case, bodily labor is useful, in the second, solitude and silence with attention are required.

The rule that Father John of Kronstadt advises to be guided by is not to take impure thoughts for something of one's own. Whether memories come from a sinful past, or fantasy takes the wrong course, these are not only features of the functioning of our consciousness; from experience, behind everything impure is the evil one, who wants to instill the idea of ​​our depravity, complete worthlessness for God and the futility of any attempts to change. This is not true, God does not look at a person like that - He just believes in each of us, and does not allow temptations that we could not endure. Our contemporary Elder Paisius advises to overcome bad thoughts not by contradicting them and not even by prayer, but by good thoughts. Too often we focus only on the fight against sin, and this sometimes petty struggle wears us out - and instead of gaining humility, we become discouraged! Meanwhile, our main goal should not be negative, but positive - to be in the knowledge of the will of God, all-good and joyful for every person, and in perfection in virtue, the fulfillment of God's truth.

Let us not weaken in the hope that any problem in this life, including the problem of purity of body and soul, can be solved with God's help, we will live in the Church, we will follow Christ, and then nothing will remain impossible for us.

Authors mentioned in the article:

Saint Ignatius Brianchaninov(1807-1867) - bishop, mentor of Russian monasticism and pious laity; not only a talented writer, but also an ascetic, and a deep, genuine mystic. He saw as his task the return to the Church of his time of the patristic spirit, from which many departed due to the lack of translations of patristic literature and the abundance of base "mystical" (sometimes Masonic and spiritualistic) literature of the West. In this muddy stream of soulful daydreaming, the saint very clearly stood up for true spirituality. Many saints were brought up on his creations.

Rev. John Cassian the Roman(c. 360-435) - a disciple and friend of the greatest saint John Chrysostom, an interlocutor of the Egyptian fathers of the desert, who opened the eastern monastic spirituality to the West. For many centuries, he became a model and authority for pious people. His ascetic creations are notable for their harmony and logic of presentation, sometimes touching on topics that would seem uncharacteristic for monks, for example, the famous conversation about friendship. It was from him that my acquaintance with the ascetic tradition of the Church began.

Holy Righteous Father John of Kronstadt(1829-1908) - popularly beloved pastor, organizer of the broadest social ministry, ardent prayer book and miracle worker, whose diary "My Life in Christ" speaks of a very close communion of his soul with God and the heavenly world and can be a great help for those who seek inspiration in God. Books about the life of the priest ep. A. Semenov-Tian-Shansky and Bishop. Veniamin Fedchenkov can be recognized not only as the best biographies of Fr. John, but also as original textbooks on spiritual life.

Saint John of the Ladder(c. 570-649) - teacher of monasticism, abbot of the famous Sinai monastery, author of "The Ladder" - the most authoritative and complete ascetic work. To be sure, his work, although written somewhat difficultly, can become an invaluable guide to solving most mental and spiritual problems, and not only a guide, but also a guide to salvation, right after the Holy Scriptures. No psychotherapist's work that I know of can match The Ladder in terms of breadth of coverage of problems and accuracy of recommendations.

Elder Paisius Svyatogorets (Athos)(1924-1994) is our contemporary, who does not fall into abstractions, but subtly feels the problems of the time. Spiritual wisdom allows him to speak in such a way that a person feels: the advice is given out of love, with compassion, and one wants to follow such advice. Due to the accessibility of the presentation, illustrative examples, his books are read very easily and have already brought spiritual and spiritual benefits to many.

Hieromonk Vasily Roslyakov, New Martyr of Optina- ritually killed by a Satanist on Easter 1993, which is described in the book "Red Easter". His diary with short extracts, the Penitential Canon compiled by him, are textbooks in climbing the spiritual ladder of the Orthodox faith.

Mario Bergner– one of the leaders of the ex-gay movement, who talks about his journey in his spiritual autobiography “Setting Life in Order”

Fornication is a very insidious passion. It takes possession of the human mind, and indulgence in it can become one of the main incentives for human life. In order to ennoble "lust", it is often called love. And from time to time this very love is not reduced solely to physical attraction, but nevertheless, it is often the fornication that lies at its base. We often hear: "I love her, but I don't want to marry her." Well, tell me, please, what kind of love can we talk about (even if we use the word love in a purely human passionate sense)? This very love is an absolutely integral part of life. "How are you? we ask when we meet. - How's your work? And on the personal front?

So if there are interruptions in work, it's nothing. And if there is a lull on the personal front, then things are bad. Very often, when one of the friends gets married, then the women have nothing to talk about (provided that the woman is faithful to her husband), the same thing happens among friends. I know many cases when, after marriage, a man almost completely broke with all his former surroundings: simply because the topics of conversation were completely exhausted.

“Just as it is pleasant for a pig to wallow in mud, so demons find pleasure for themselves in fornication and uncleanness.”St. Ephraim Sirin

One of my acquaintances, an unmarried woman, thought about going to confession and generally starting churching. The only thing that stopped her by and large was her unwillingness to leave fornication.

And what about not making love at all? But that's impossible. Without it, life almost loses its meaning. I can't wait to get married! After all, I'm not going to get married in the next couple of years.

The fight against the spirit of fornication of St. fathers call the struggle fierce. Fornication begins to overcome from the “first age of maturity” and does not stop before victory over all other passions. In order to overcome fornication, it is not enough to observe physical abstinence and chastity, but one must all the time be in repentant contrition of the spirit and relentless prayer against this most unclean spirit. There is also a need for bodily labor and needlework, which keeps the heart from wandering and returns it to itself, and most of all, deep true humility is needed, without which no victory can be gained over any passion.
The start of the fight

A difficult struggle with the passion of fornication must begin, first of all, with abstinence in food (“Punish thoughts with the poverty of food, so that they think not about fornication, but about hunger” - Nilus of Sinai), that is, from fasting, because, according to St. Fathers, gluttony invariably leads to the passion of fornication: "The pillar rests on its foundation - and the passion of fornication rests on satiety" (Nil of Sinai). Drunkenness is especially dangerous from this point of view.
First, drunkenness lowers a person's ability to control his actions and manage his desires.

Secondly, as you know, alcohol kindles lust. Many examples of this can be found. How often do you hear that something happened “drinking”. And here it is impossible to speak only about the loss of control, since it also happens that “drunken” happens to that person with whom it is quite difficult to even imagine intimacy when “sober”. However, as is again known, at a certain stage of intoxication, desire already disappears and intercourse, on the contrary, becomes absolutely unattractive or even impossible. The demon of fornication is replaced by the demon of despondency.

Among the sins caused by fornication, St. Ignatius Brianchaninov refers:
- Prodigal irritation, prodigal sensations and positions of the soul and heart.
- Acceptance of impure thoughts, conversation with them, delight in them, permission to them, slowing down in them.
— Prodigal dreams and captivity.

- Failure to keep the senses, especially the sense of touch, which is an audacity that destroys all virtues.
- Swearing and reading voluptuous books.
- Natural prodigal sins: fornication and adultery.
- Sins of prodigal unnatural.

“The dog of this prodigal demon”, when he comes to you, drive away with the spiritual instrument of prayer; and no matter how much he continues to be shameless, do not yield to him.” St. John of the Ladder

Non-keeping of feelings (meaning five senses: touch, smell, hearing, sight, taste) - we very often do not notice this sin, considering it the norm of things. It must be said that intemperance in feelings is considered in our time a sign of looseness and uncomplexity and is put more in a plus for a person than a minus. Of course, this is not about gross harassment, which is still not encouraged. If among the older generation close physical contacts are not yet very popular and familiar pats on the shoulder cause embarrassment, then among the youth they are quite accepted.

However, there are occasional examples of the opposite.

The girl met a young man. After talking with him for a while, she was surprised to notice that he did not look into her eyes during the conversation.

“Listen, why do you always look away when you talk to me? Well, you're not my girlfriend. Eye contact is quite intimate. I can not stare at an unfamiliar young lady. It's the same as hugging you or kissing you.

Delighting with the sight of beautiful women and men is also considered to be a failure of sight. And an addiction to all kinds of perfumes, colognes and other perfumes is a failure to preserve the sense of smell, since, as you know, certain components are added to perfumes that act excitingly on a person.

Deaf ears can be called not only the desire to listen to seductive speeches, but also the love of compliments about our appearance, sexuality, etc. There is, for example, a wonderful saying that “a woman loves with her ears.” However, this is true not only for women, but also for men, too, since flattering speeches often provoke a feeling of love, which is closely associated with sexual desires. Vanity is very often an aid to fornication.
Acceptance of impure thoughts, delight in them.

Pleasure with unclean thoughts, firstly, is a sin in itself, and secondly, it leads to inflaming carnal desires and often provokes a person to commit physical fornication.

A child, learning for the first time “where children come from”, experiences a rather unpleasant feeling, a feeling of disgust. And only then, having already got used to the concept of the technology of conceiving a child, does he begin to feel desire and attraction to a being of the opposite sex.

In the process of arousal, our psyche plays the biggest role, not physiology. If we assume that nothing depends on our will, then it will turn out that we should react to any individual of the opposite sex in exactly the same way. But that's not how things happen in life.

Having understood that the physical process of arousal directly depends on mental processes, we begin to realize why it is so dangerous to accept impure thoughts. Without driving away the thought from yourself, you already, as it were, agree to sin, you already commit it. And from inner consent to sin to committing it on the physical level is within easy reach. The gospel says: Whoever looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.».

One brother, being indignant with fornication, came to the great old man and asked him: “Show love, pray for me, for the lust of fornication revolts me.” The elder prayed to God for him. The brother comes to him another time and says the same thing. And again the elder began to pray to God, saying: “Lord, reveal to me the condition of this brother, and from where does the devil attack him? Because I prayed to You, and he still didn't get peace." Then he had a vision: he saw this brother sitting, and next to him - the spirit of fornication, and the brother communicates with him, and the Angel sent to help him stands aside and is angry with the monk, because he did not betray himself to God, but, delighting in thoughts, he gave over his whole mind to the workings of the devil. And the elder said: “You yourself are to blame, because you are carried away by your thoughts,” and taught the brother to resist thoughts.

When a lustful thought is accepted and agreed to settle in a person’s head, it gradually takes possession of his mind, and erotic pictures are already drawn in the human brain that delight him. In this case, we can already talk about prodigal dreams.

In fact, the difference between accepting thoughts and dreaming is not so great. The first almost inevitably leads to the second, and the second is necessarily the result of the first. We speak of prodigal dreams when the enjoyment of prodigal thoughts occurs on a conscious level. A person begins to draw images that excite him, invent various situations and plots on this topic, and in general indulge in thoughts about fornication.

Often a person obsessed with prodigal dreams, in search of nourishment for them, turns to erotic literature, to cinema, goes to nightclubs to watch striptease, etc.

When tempting a person, demons first draw beautiful romantic pictures, which later turn, as the fornication indulges, into ugly, anti-aesthetic, blackish panels, which are much closer in essence to what the demon of fornication looks like in reality.

Obscene language is also considered a manifestation of fornication. Foul language is the use of words related to taboo (forbidden), informal vocabulary. Basically, such words are connected precisely with the sexual life of a person. Other expressions that are considered rude and abusive (for example, vocabulary denoting mental abilities, or rather, the absence of them, or character traits) do not apply to foul language. In principle, it is swear words that, according to the assumption of some scientists, in ancient times did not have a negative connotation, but were ritual and were replaced by euphemisms, because they had a sacred meaning, are considered bad, forbidden.

Finally, the most pronounced manifestation of fornication is the extramarital intercourse of a man and a woman. If a person who indulges in fornication is single, then his sin is called fornication, if a person cheats on his spouse, then adultery.
The most extreme degree of depravity is unnatural forms of fornication such as sodomy (homosexuality), etc.

Of course, starting to fight with the passion of fornication, it is necessary, first of all, to stop indulging it, that is, to stop all extramarital sexual relations. However, this first step is quite obvious, because priests often refuse to forgive sins for people who live extramarital sex. Repentance for adultery or fornication implies a willingness to end a life of fornication and turn to chastity.

An extramarital union can be broken or, on the contrary, legalized. Marriage (married) can be annulled in case of infidelity of one of the spouses. If the family breaks up, the Church allows remarriage and even remarriage, clearly preferring it to illegal cohabitation.

Teaching the fight against the passion of fornication, St. fathers advised:
Refrain from food. “He who feeds the flesh of his body, the flesh feeds evil lusts, and shameful thoughts will not fail him” (St. Ephraim the Syrian). “Saturation of the womb is the mother of fornication, and oppression of the womb is the source of purity” (St. Ephraim the Syrian). Abstinence in food has a dual meaning. First, as it was already said above, by mortifying the flesh, we thereby strengthen the spirit to fight passions. Secondly, by strengthening the flesh, we thereby strengthen its desires, that is, purely carnal passions. A weak and infirm person will never suffer from fornication as much as a strong and healthy one.
Refraining from speech.

Once a brother came to Abba Pimen and said: “What should I do, father? I suffer from prodigal lust. And now I went to Abba Ivistion, and he said to me: do not let her stay in you for a long time. Abba Pimen answers his brother: “The deeds of Abba Ivistion are lofty — he is in heaven, along with the Angels — and does not know that you and I are in fornication! But I will tell you from myself: if a person restrains his belly and tongue, then he can control himself.

Abstinence of speech, and at best, of thought is very important. Idle talk, like idle thought, can lead far. In principle, any idleness gives rise to prodigal lust, which manifests itself either in thought or in word.

The girl in confession mentions idle talk as one of her sins. The priest, hearing this, picks up her speech:

- Well, if idle talk, then it means condemnation, and slander, and foul language, and many other sins of the word.

Empty chatter, seemingly harmless at first glance, always makes a person more licentious. Wandering in a word, one way or another, we begin to touch on certain subjects, discussing which we kindle passions.
“Do not let your eyes wander here and there and do not peer into someone else's beauty, so that with the help of your eyes your opponent will not depose you” (St. Ephraim the Syrian). To this advice can be added the recommendation to restrain all five of your senses. First of all, of course, touch, since the most seductive is not sight, but still touch. In the future, you need to pay attention to vision. A wandering glance often betrays the lust of nature. In particular, in the Caucasus, a woman staring around is considered a dissolute person and invariably provokes a lot of indecent proposals. However, in Europe the situation is not much different, just the causal relationship is less conscious.
“Restrain, brother, from jokes, lest they make you shameless; shamelessness is the mother of indecency” (St. Ephraim the Syrian).
It happens that the evil one inspires you with such a seductive thought: "Satisfy your lust, and then you will repent." To this answer him: "And how should I know that I will have time to repent if I indulge in fornication."
In the same way he will say to you: “Satisfy your passion one day and you will calm down.” But remember that the more you eat, the more you want. Your stomach is stretched and requires more food, but if you abstain from food, then the need for it decreases every day. So it is with prodigal passion. The more you indulge her, the more she overcomes you. Abstinence, on the other hand, leads in the end to the weakening of warfare.
And, seeing that you lusted for a woman (man), the demon will tell you: “You have already committed a sin by lusting a woman in your heart, so now satisfy your passions, for to do and to lust are one and the same. Since you have already sinned, what is there to lose now?” But answer him: “Although I have fallen in my eye and committed adultery in my heart, yet now it is better for me to repent of this and ask God for forgiveness, rather than aggravate my sin by committing adultery also in the body.”
“Whoever tries to stop this warfare with one restraint is like a man who is trying to swim out of the abyss of the sea, acting with one hand. Conjugate humility with abstinence; because the first without the last turns out to be useless ”(St. John of the Ladder).
"Don't be fooled, young man! I saw some people praying for the faces they loved, who, being impelled to do so by fornication, thought, however, that they were fulfilling the duty of holy love ”(St. John of the Ladder).
Do not allow yourself to think about the dreams that were in a dream during the day; because the demons are striving for this, in order to defile us who are awake with the help of dreams.
Do not remain in idleness, because “idleness gives birth to love, but having given birth, it protects and cherishes” (Ovid). The fact that labor, especially physical work, helps in the fight against any passions, St. fathers write quite often. As for the prodigal passion directly, then work is an especially good medicine for it.

But deepening into work can only somewhat weaken the fornication, and in no way eradicate thoughts from the heart. Tearful prayer, repentance and frequent participation in the Sacraments of confession and communion heals from fornication.
It is extremely difficult to achieve complete victory over prodigal passion.

There are often stories in the patericons about how young monks came to the elders with the words: “I want to leave the monastery and return to the world, because fornication thoughts overwhelm me too much.” To this, the wise fathers answered: “I am many times older than you, and as far as I can remember, fornication thoughts have always overcome me. And I still can’t cope with them, and you thought to overcome them in your youth. And the brothers remained in the monastery in order to continue to fight with fornication.

St. Ephraim the Syrian writes: “If carnal warfare arises in you, do not be afraid and do not lose heart. By this, you will give courage to the enemy against yourself, and he will begin to instill seductive thoughts in you, suggesting: “It is not possible to stop burning in you once you do not satisfy your lust.”/…/ But do not be cowardly, God will not leave you.”

Acquisition of the virtue of chastity is a direct road to the Kingdom of Heaven. St. John Kas

The child, having been born, is pure, like an angel ... The world that the baby gradually cognizes and accepts into itself, imposes its seal on this blank sheet. Sometimes so bright and not erased. Especially when parents have no time and they cannot answer the elementary questions of their child about where it came from. Then the questions get more and more serious. And there are still no answers. No, they are dating. But in an unacceptable form for a childish or adolescent soul. The Holy Fathers talk about...

From the reference dictionary: “Fornication - 1. Sin against chastity; one of the passions in the ascetic teaching of the Church. 2. In the religious-metaphorical sense - any deviation of a person from God's Providence about him; idolatry, unbelief. In Russian, fornication has synonyms: fornication, debauchery, depravity.

The fight against the spirit of fornication is the longest, most constant and for the few ending in victory. The passion of fornication begins to manifest itself in a person from early maturity and does not stop until he conquers his other passions. Since the uprising of this passion is twofold (in the body and in the soul), then it must also be resisted with a twofold weapon. One fast is not enough to acquire perfect chastity. It is necessary to add to it both repentant contrition of the spirit, and relentless prayer against this bad spirit (the passion of fornication). In addition, one must constantly read the Holy Scriptures, engage in divine thinking, alternating this with physical labor and needlework, which keep thoughts from wandering here and there. Most of all, one must have deep humility, without which victory cannot be gained over any passion (St. John Kas.).

How high is the dignity of chastity, so strong are the slanders of the enemy who take up arms against him. Therefore, with all diligence, we must not only be temperate in everything, but constantly grieve in our hearts with a prayerful sigh, so that the Holy Spirit, with the grace-filled dew descending in the heart, cools and quenches the furnace of our flesh, which the king of Babylon (the devil) is constantly trying to kindle ( Rev. John Kas.).

When lust is kindled, think of an unquenchable fire and an undying worm, and immediately the flame in your members will be extinguished. Otherwise, weakened, you will be defeated and you will get used to sin, although you will repent. Therefore, from the very beginning, be strict with any such desire, so that it does not overcome you and so that you do not get used to yielding victory to the enemy. After all, habit is second nature. Those who are accustomed to yielding victory to sinful desire will always be convicted by their conscience; and although in front of others he will show a cheerful face, but inwardly he will be despondent because of the convictions of his conscience. For the property of lust is to communicate painful sorrow to those who fulfill it. Therefore, listen with your soul, always having God in you (Ephraim the Sir.)

When the demon begins to draw seductive objects in your imagination, and imagines in your mind the beauty of a woman that you once saw, bring the fear of God into yourself, and remember those who died in sins - think about the day when your soul will be separated from the body - imagine God’s voice that brings oneself into awe, which will be heard by those who are negligent about a righteous life and who have not kept the commandments of Christ: “Depart from me, damned, into eternal fire, prepared for the devil and his angels” (). Still imagine an undying worm and unceasing torment. Think about this, and the thirst for pleasure will dissipate in you, as wax melts from the face of fire, for demons and moments cannot stand against the fear of God. (Ephraim Sir.)

The overcoming of this passion is conditioned by the perfect cleansing of the heart, from which, according to the Lord's word, the poison of this disease is exuded. “From the heart,” He says, “evil thoughts proceed… adulteries, fornications, and so on” (; Rev. John Kas.).

Do not let your eyes wander hither and thither, and do not peer into someone else's beauty, so that with the help of your eyes your opponent will not depose you (Ephraim Sir.)

If the demon of fornication troubles you, rebuke it, saying: “May the Lord consume you, full of stench, demon of uncleanness.” For we know the one who said: “Carnal thoughts are enmity against God” (; Ephraim Sir.).

If carnal warfare arises in you, do not be afraid and do not lose heart. Otherwise, you will give courage to the enemy (the devil), and he will begin to inspire you with seductive thoughts: “The kindling in you will not stop until you satisfy your lust.” But patiently endure the Lord, with weeping, pour out a prayer before His goodness, and He will hear you, and remove you from the ditch of passions (impure thoughts) and from the mud of mud (shameful dreams) and put your feet on the stone of purity (). Then you will see the help that comes to you from Him. Only endure, do not let your thoughts relax, do not become exhausted, scooping water out of the boat, because the harbor of life is near. Then you will call, and He will say: “Here I am!” (). But He is waiting to see your feat: are you sure even to death you are ready to resist sin. So, do not be cowardly: God will not leave you. The Lord looks at your feat, both the faces of angels and the crowd of demons look at him. Angels are ready to give a crown to the winner, and demons - to cover the defeated with shame. Be careful not to grieve your (angels) and not to please the demons (Ephraim Sir.).

Abba Pimen says regarding prodigal thoughts: “If a chest filled with things stands for a long time, and the clothes in it are not revised, then it will decay over time. The same thing happens with bad thoughts put into us by the devil: if we don’t put them into practice, they will eventually decay and disappear” (Abba Pimen).

The novice asked Abba Agathon how to deal with fornication. The elder replied: “Go, cast down your strength before God [extremely humble yourself before Him], and you will find peace.”

And indeed, if every success in virtue is the work of the grace of the Lord, and the overcoming of various passions is His victory, then all the more so the acquisition of purity and the overcoming of fornication is the work of the special grace of God, as the holy fathers, experienced in cleansing from this passion, testify. For, being in the flesh, not feeling its sting is in some way like going out of it. And therefore, it is impossible for a person to fly on his wings to the heavenly height of perfection, if the grace of the Lord does not extract him from earthly mire. For people by no virtue so closely resemble angels as by acquiring the grace of purity (St. John Kas.).

An indicator of purity and perfection achieved is that at rest or in a pleasant dream a person does not have any seductive image, or, having arisen, this image does not arouse any carnal desires in him. However, involuntary desire, although not imputed as a sin, indicates that the soul has not yet reached perfection, and the roots of passion have not yet been uprooted (St. John Kas.).

The sin of fornication has the property that it unites two bodies, though not legally, into one body. For this reason, although he is forgiven immediately after repentance for him and confession, on the indispensable condition that the repentant leave him, but the cleansing and sobering of the body and soul from prodigal sin requires a long time, so that the connection and unity established between the bodies ... and infecting the soul , decayed and destroyed. Those who have not yet acquired true prayer of the heart are helped (in the fight against the prodigal demon) by suffering in bodily prayer (St. Ignatius (Bryanchaninov) ...

Prodigal lust must be stopped by the memory that for this sin the conscience greatly torments and torments. Advice from Abba Dorotheus The devil, out of envy, raised a scolding against you. Take care of your eyes and do not eat to satiety. Use a little wine, and then according to the weakness of the body, if necessary. Acquire humility, which dissolves all enemy networks (St. Tikhon of Zadonsk).

Whoever wrestles with this rival (the prodigal demon) with bodily labors and sweats, he is like one who has bound his enemy with a weak rope ... Whoever fights against him with abstinence and vigilance is like one who has put iron fetters on his enemy ... Whoever is armed with humility, without anger and thirst, he is like a kill his opponent and buried him in the sand. Whoever tries to quench the fornication by abstinence alone is like a man who thinks to swim out of the abyss, moving with one hand. Combine humility with abstinence, for the former is of no use without the latter (John of the Ladder).

He who looks at a woman with lust, whether he be a layman or a monk, will be equally punished for adultery. Why are you staring at someone else's face? Why are you heading for the abyss? Why are you putting yourself in the net? Protect your eyes, cover your sight, lay a law on your eyes, listen to Christ, Who, threatening, equates a shameless look with adultery and to the fulfillment of a wish If you want to look and enjoy the look, then look constantly at your wife and love her; no law forbids it. If you look at someone else's beauty, you will offend both your wife, turning your eyes away from her, and the one you look at, because you touch her contrary to the law. Don't say: what if I stare at a beautiful woman? If you commit adultery in your heart, you will soon dare to commit adultery in your flesh. Adultery is the result of vanity, sensual inflamedness and excessive voluptuousness. If your brother has committed adultery, do not revile him with insulting words, do not mock him. You will not do him any good by this, but you will only harm him (John Chrysostom).

The pillar rests on the foundation, and the fornication rests on satiety (Nile of Sinai).

Adultery is uprooted in oneself by one who turns his eyes down, and his soul to the Lord (Ephraim the Syrian).

A woman who dresses up in order to arouse the desire of the intemperate for herself is already committing fornication in her heart (Basil the Great).

And that by the permission of God the scolding of fornication thoughts, and especially demonic dreams, is allowed to you, then do not be surprised much about this that the all-evil enemy in dreams represents such stinginess! But only, my beloved daughter, know that this allowance was not easy for you! But for the contempt of others, some of the weakly falling: apparently, in her thoughts she secretly condemned and despised. And therefore, secretly, the grace of God departs not far from us, and the greedy enemy, seeing us defenseless, takes revenge on us and<повергает> into such placeless and stingy thoughts and imaginations. But we, having been punished by this event and tired to the point of exhaustion, and as if wounded and wounded, let us resort to the All-True Physician of our souls and bodies, our Lord Jesus Christ, as if we were infancy and knew by experience our weakness and insignificance! And let us ask the All-Merciful God, that He Himself will take revenge on our rival, the devil, who seduces us, for us, weak and falling into his sorrows filled with nets. And may he save us, the weakest, from all the arrows of the enemy (St. Leo). Call on the prayers of those who struggled for purity, the holy martyr Fomaida, St. John the Long-suffering, St. Moses Ugrin and the prayers of the spiritual fathers and all mothers; and count yourself the worst of all. During the struggle, all these means are useful ... N. say: when you humble yourself, then the abuse will subside - sleep less, eat less, beware of idle talk, condemnation and not like to adorn yourself with a good dress, keep your eyes and ears. All these means are protective; do not yet allow thoughts to enter the heart, but when they begin to come, rise up and ask for help from God (St. Macarius). M., when it is absolutely not supposed to keep her doors with barriers about her mouth, (then) otherwise it is impossible for her to free herself from the embarrassment and torment of the most voluptuous pretexts and thoughts of fornication, and from these - boredom and despondency, and then the most pernicious thoughts of despair (St. Leo) . You write that you are attacked by lustful thoughts, but from prayer you do not have the consolation that you had before, and you do not feel warmth. Force yourself to prayer as before, do not lose heart and do not grow cold. Although you are sometimes defeated in thoughts, but again, with a new fervor of zeal and zeal, turn to God and in humility of spirit and hope in His mercy, continue the usual prayers at home and church, surrendering all of yourself to the will of God. Take care of your conscience and eyes, have the fear of God, think more often about death, about the Last Judgment and about the fact that if now you do not manage yourself in a charitable good life, then later on you will completely weaken towards goodness. Against adulterous thoughts, arm yourself with abstinence in food and sleep, try to always be in work and work, and most of all, have humility and self-reproach in everything and always, do not condemn anyone (St. Ambrose). From prodigal passion, pray to the Monk John the Long-suffering and the holy martyr Fomaida, lay three bows every day. Pray also for those sisters to whom you have dislike, inequality. As it is said: pray for each other, that you may be healed (St. Joseph). Fornication dreams come at night in a dream ... When this happens, you should make 50 prostrations and read: “Have mercy on me, God,” - psalm (50) When fornication thoughts attack, pray to the holy martyr Fomaida. And make the Jesus Prayer stronger... (St. Anatoly). You ask me to tell you a remedy for getting rid of lustful thoughts. Of course, as the holy fathers teach: the first thing is to humble yourself, the second is not to look at either the deacons or the young children, and the third, most importantly, is to endure (St. Anatoly). At the same time, you complain about a neighbor who disagrees with you and about prodigal passion. You are a wonderful girl! You stupid nun! She burns on the right with fire, and on the left she is doused with cold water. Yes, you foolish one, take water and fill the fire with it! That is, bear with the weak sister! And the passion of fornication will fade away. After all, this passion lives and is supported by hellish oppression (arson) - pride and impatience! Be patient and be saved! Let the enemy and the flesh oppress you, but I will not stop repeating the Psalm word to you: “be patient with the Lord, be of good cheer, and let your heart be strong, and be patient with the Lord!” () (teacher Anatoly). Saint Mark the Ascetic says in his spiritual law: "the root of lust is the love of praise and glory of man." Lust intensifies, as other holy fathers say, when a person loves bodily rest (in food, drink and sleep) and especially when he does not keep his eyes from seductive objects (St. Ambrose). Te6ya is worried about the inappropriate swearing of the flesh. Where there should be spiritual benefit for you, here the enemy contrives to raise a temptation for you. Despise this, because the absurdity of absurdities is such a suggestion of the enemy. You write that in this struggle it seems to you: someone is standing next to you. Similar things happen when a person, during confession, either completely forgot some important sin, or did not know how to confess something as it should. Pray to the Queen of Heaven and the Guardian Angel to help you remember and confess this. Then a worthwhile dream will pass. You also need to humble yourself before God and people, considering yourself the worst of all. Because of carnal warfare, I find it inappropriate for you to go to Moscow for treatment. This fight will intensify even more. It is better to endure suffering from illness to cleanse your sins. - That's more true (St. Ambrose). (Optinsky elders).