Church wedding: everything you need to know about the ceremony. When and on what days can you get married? Subtleties of church sacraments

Advice for those planning to get married.

First of all, it is necessary to agree on the place and time of the wedding sacrament. Now in many churches there is a preliminary registration, which indicates not only the day, but also the time of the wedding.

Any relative can do it. In this case, the wedding will be performed by the priest, who will be the first to perform the ceremony. In those churches where there is no such record, the newlyweds draw up a receipt for the sacrament on their wedding day, behind a candle box. However, it is impossible to give an exact time here, since weddings will begin only after other requirements. But you can agree with a specific priest, if there is a need for this.

In any case, the church will need a marriage certificate, so registration of the marriage in the registry office must be before the wedding. If the obstacles listed above arise, those wishing to get married must personally contact the office of the ruling bishop. The Lord will consider all the circumstances. If the decision is positive, he will put forward a resolution according to which the wedding will take place in any temple. In the first centuries of Christianity, weddings took place directly behind Divine Liturgy. This does not happen now, but sharing the sacrament before starting married life is extremely important. Therefore... Newlyweds must come to the church on the wedding day at the beginning of the service, do not eat anything, do not drink or smoke the day before - from twelve o'clock at night. And if married life already takes place, abstain from marital relations on the last night.

In the church, the bride and groom confess, pray during the liturgy and receive Holy Communion. After this, prayers, memorial services and funeral services usually take about an hour. During this time, you can change into wedding clothes (if the temple has a room for this). There are other points that it is better to pay attention to: it is best if the bride wears comfortable shoes, and not high-heeled shoes, which are difficult to stand on for several hours in a row; the presence of friends and relatives of the newlyweds at the liturgy is desirable, but, as a last resort, they can come to the beginning of the wedding; Taking photographs and filming a wedding with a video camera is not allowed in all churches: it is better to do without this by taking a memorable photograph against the background of the temple after the sacrament is performed; wedding rings must be given in advance to the crowning priest so that he can consecrate them by placing them on the Throne; Bring a piece of white linen or a towel with you. The young will stand on it; the bride must certainly have a headdress; cosmetics and jewelry - either absent or in minimal quantities; are required pectoral crosses for both spouses; According to Russian tradition, every married couple has witnesses (best men) who organize the wedding feast.

They will also be useful in the temple - to hold crowns over the heads of the newlyweds. It is better if it is two men, since the crowns are quite heavy. Best men must be baptized. Church charter prohibits marrying several couples at the same time, but, as practice shows, this also happens. Of course, each couple would like to get married separately. But in this case, the sacrament can drag on for a long time (the duration of one wedding is 45-60 minutes). If the newlyweds are ready to wait until they have married everyone else, then they will not be denied a separate sacrament. In large cathedrals, weddings are performed separately for a double fee. On weekdays (Monday, Wednesday, Friday) the likelihood that several couples will come is much less than on Sundays.

Days when there is no wedding

1. Tuesday
2. Thursday
3. Saturday
4. Lent(seven weeks before Easter)
5. Petrov fast (second Monday after Trinity)
6. Assumption Fast (August 14-27)
7. Nativity Fast (November 28 - January 7)
8. Christmas time (January 7-20)
9. Cheese week (one week before the start of Lent)
10. Easter week (Bright Week)
11. February 14 (Eve of the Presentation of the Lord)
12. April 6 (eve of the Annunciation of the Blessed Virgin Mary)
13. Eve of the Ascension of the Lord (39th day after Easter)
14. Eve of the Holy Trinity (49th day after Easter)
15. Trinity Day
16. September 10, 11 (eve and day of the Beheading of John the Baptist)
17. September 20 (Eve of the Nativity of the Blessed Virgin Mary)
18. September 26,27 (eve and day of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross)
19. October 13 (eve of the Intercession of the Blessed Virgin Mary)

Dates are given according to the new style.

Even when “Primordial Rus'” appeared, traditions, holidays and special wedding rituals began to appear. That's when wedding superstitions began. If you look back into the past, many people know and have read about it more than once that why can't you get married in Saturday?

In the old days, people strictly adhered to the holy rules of the Orthodox Church. Which read: getting married on a day off is a great sin. The church did not marry such couples, but corrupt priests had weddings. By and large, this was practiced often. Such couples were considered sinful people. They cursed them and tried to avoid them, to take the tenth route when they met, so as not to invite trouble upon themselves.

They despised sinners and tried in every possible way to expel them from the place of settlement. Many terrible things were attributed to them, for example: poor crop yields, drought. The Church tried to blame on such outcasts everything that did not work out in nature. As a result, the couple lived poorly and subsequently separated. These outcasts really just had no luck in anything in life, and this has been proven to be true among old, elderly people.

Passed on from generation to generation. Then and now, getting married has become a fashionable attribute. What if you think about it? It was not for nothing that the church prohibited weddings on Saturday. On any day of the week, except religious ones, it was possible to get married. What is happening in the world now?

Let's figure it out Why can't we get married on Saturday?

In ancient Russian books written in Latin it is said: “According to your faith, be it done to you.” Think about these wonderful words. They make sense of what we are talking about and doing now. And it is very important to understand them with all your heart. Better yet, remember some important points from your own life and ask yourself this question, the answer of which will still return to what was said above. Whatever one may say.

Our world today

• Many people get married, but only a few get married. Only those people who are baptized go down the aisle to get married. The wedding process itself is a secret between two people. Because unbaptized people cannot even cross the threshold of the church. You will inevitably become ill and faint. Discomfort occurs throughout the body. Millions of people have experienced this condition. Therefore, if you decide to give a wedding dinner, we advise you to first be baptized. But remember, you can’t leave after that. Permission can only be obtained from the bishop. This is a very long procedure and a serious step.
• But there are exceptions: if one spouse died. It’s not for nothing that they say: “And only death will separate us.” Think carefully many times before taking such a responsible step in life. But now priests perform weddings on Saturday and on another day of the week. Only true priests who are confident in their rightness will not allow this. Now everything is bought and sold. Basically, people have little left that is sacred. They don’t adhere to the old rules, and then they suffer in marriage for the rest of their lives. It's not worth it. Look, even presidents and their wards all get married, but not on Saturday. This is a clear example of modernity.
• Don't get married on Saturday, it won't lead to anything good. Think about your future, present children. After all, children are primarily responsible for our sins and the sins of our parents. Why should they ruin their lives by failing to become happy? After all, when everything goes well in life for children, then our parents feel peace of mind.

I would like to add to everything that has been said. Nobody is forcing anything on you. Only you decide when to get married and where. It will be a pity if you neglect the holy rules and disobey. Without God there is no way to the threshold. Be happy!

Advice for those planning to get married.

First of all, it is necessary to agree on the place and time of the wedding sacrament. Now in many churches there is a preliminary registration, which indicates not only the day, but also the time of the wedding.

Any relative can do it. In this case, the wedding will be performed by the priest, who will be the first to perform the ceremony. In those churches where there is no such record, the newlyweds draw up a receipt for the sacrament on their wedding day, behind a candle box. However, it is impossible to give an exact time here, since weddings will begin only after other requirements. But you can agree with a specific priest, if there is a need for this.

In any case, the church will need a marriage certificate, so registration of the marriage in the registry office must be before the wedding. If the obstacles listed above arise, those wishing to get married must personally contact the office of the ruling bishop. The Lord will consider all the circumstances. If the decision is positive, he will put forward a resolution according to which the wedding will take place in any temple. In the first centuries of Christianity, weddings took place directly after the Divine Liturgy. This does not happen now, but sharing the sacrament before starting married life is extremely important. Therefore... Newlyweds must come to the temple on the wedding day at the beginning of the service, do not eat anything, do not drink or smoke the day before - from twelve o'clock at night. And if married life already takes place, abstain from marital relations on the last night.

In the church, the bride and groom confess, pray during the liturgy and receive Holy Communion. After this, prayers, memorial services and funeral services usually take about an hour. During this time, you can change into wedding clothes (if the temple has room for this). There are other points that are better to pay attention to: it is best if the bride wears comfortable shoes, and not high-heeled shoes, which are difficult to stand on for several hours in a row; the presence of friends and relatives of the newlyweds at the liturgy is desirable, but, as a last resort, they can come to the beginning of the wedding; Taking photographs and filming a wedding with a video camera is not allowed in all churches: it is better to do without this by taking a memorable photograph against the background of the temple after the sacrament is performed; wedding rings must be given in advance to the wedding priest so that he can consecrate them by placing them on the Throne; Bring a piece of white linen or a towel with you. The young will stand on it; the bride must certainly have a headdress; cosmetics and jewelry - either absent or in minimal quantities; crosses are required for both spouses; According to Russian tradition, every married couple has witnesses (best men) who organize the wedding feast.

They will also be useful in the temple - to hold crowns over the heads of the newlyweds. It is better if it is two men, since the crowns are quite heavy. Best men must be baptized. Church charter prohibits marrying several couples at the same time, but, as practice shows, this also happens. Of course, each couple would like to get married separately. But in this case, the sacrament can drag on for a long time (the duration of one wedding is 45-60 minutes). If the newlyweds are ready to wait until they have married everyone else, then they will not be denied a separate sacrament. In large cathedrals, weddings are performed separately for a double fee. On weekdays (Monday, Wednesday, Friday) the likelihood that several couples will come is much less than on Sundays.

Days when there is no wedding

1. Tuesday
2. Thursday
3. Saturday
4. Lent (seven weeks before Easter)
5. Petrov fast (second Monday after Trinity)
6. Assumption Fast (August 14-27)
7. Nativity Fast (November 28 - January 7)
8. Christmas time (January 7-20)
9. Cheese week (one week before the start of Lent)
10. Easter week (Bright Week)
11. February 14 (Eve of the Presentation of the Lord)
12. April 6 (eve of the Annunciation of the Blessed Virgin Mary)
13. Eve of the Ascension of the Lord (39th day after Easter)
14. Eve of the Holy Trinity (49th day after Easter)
15. Trinity Day
16. September 10, 11 (eve and day of the Beheading of John the Baptist)
17. September 20 (Eve of the Nativity of the Blessed Virgin Mary)
18. September 26,27 (eve and day of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross)
19. October 13 (eve of the Intercession of the Blessed Virgin Mary)

Dates are given according to the new style.

Wedding has long been considered an important and very responsible step for married couple. With its help, spouses become spiritually even closer to each other. In addition, it is believed that after this sacrament, love gains immortality. The Svadebka.ws portal will tell you when is the best time to get married in 2018.

Is it possible to get married during Lent?

Many people ask this question married couples. To know which days you can get married, it’s easier to keep in mind when you can’t do this. Thus, it will not be possible to perform the sacrament during the fasts: Great (February 19 - April 7), Petrov (June 4 - July 11), Uspensky (August 14 - 27) and Rozhdestvensky (November 28 - January 6). In addition, in accordance with the peculiarities of weddings in the Orthodox Church, couples will not be able to do this in:

Also, in the church they do not marry on the eve of temple holidays, which parishes establish depending on their own needs. Moreover, the list of what is necessary for a wedding is the same, regardless of the place where the sacrament is performed.

It is believed that during such days people need to observe abstinence, both in thoughts and behavior. Therefore, according to church tradition, a wedding during Lent is prohibited, because it can then turn into a feast and violation of chastity.

Is it possible to get married on Saturday?

The canons give a clear answer to this question: on Saturday, as well as on Tuesday and Thursday, weddings are prohibited. This is due to the fact that Sunday night should be dedicated to God. The night before Wednesday and Friday is fast, so there will be restrictions here too.

Good days for a wedding

The most suitable days for performing the sacrament are Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Many people think whether it is possible to get married on Sunday, as well as whether it is possible to get married on Friday. The Church does not object to this day. Moreover, it is on Sunday that there are the most people who want to perform the ritual. You can also have a wedding on your wedding day.

If we take specific dates into account, the church says that the strongest families are those that get married on the first Sunday after Easter. This period is also called Red Hill, and in 2018 it will fall on April 15. It got its name due to the fact that by this time the ground began to be freed from snow. First of all, he left the hills and hills, where youth festivities, round dances, and so on immediately began. Such slides were called “red” - that is, “beautiful”. This day was considered a traditional maiden holiday, because it was greatest number weddings The tradition has been preserved after many centuries, and today it is still revered by newlyweds.

The weeks between Epiphany and Maslenitsa are considered good days: from January 20 to February 12. The period from Petrov to the Dormition Lent (from July 12 to August 13), as well as all the Mother of God days, especially the day of the Kazan Icon, also fits here. Mother of God(November 4). She is considered the patroness and defender of the Russian land. She is also miraculous, it is customary to pray to her for family happiness, the blessing of the newlyweds and the birth of children.

The Church gives a clear answer on what days of the week you can get married, and they can also become favorable days for a wedding.

Who shouldn't get married?

Here is a list of people for whom the ritual is prohibited:

• Unbaptized .
• For those who are already married or committed to another person.
• Blood close relatives up to the fourth generation.
• Same-sex and transgender people.
• Minors.
• Godparents and children.
• Monastics.
• Those who are in clergy, starting with subdeacon.
• Adoptive parents and adopted children.

You also need to know that

The wedding ceremony is not only beautiful and ancient tradition, but also a responsible step towards creating a strong and happy family. Sometimes a couple comes to this important step years later, only when people are finally convinced of their feelings and intention to live together for the rest of their lives.
There are certain days for a church wedding. The most successful day for the sacrament of Wedding is considered to be the 1st Sunday after Easter, which is popularly called Red Hill, in 2017 this day falls on April 23rd, and in 2018 this day falls on April 15th. For the convenience of determining the date, a wedding calendar for 2017 – 2018. From the wedding calendar you will find out on which days, according to the canons of the Russian Orthodox Church You can have a wedding ceremony, and on which days you can’t (calendar at the end of the article), but let’s start with to whom who can and cannot get married in the Church.

Who can get married in the Church

1. The basic requirements for newlyweds are to be members of the Church (to be baptized, to wear a cross);
An important condition for recognizing the validity of a church marriage is the unity of religion.

2. Have a certificate from the registry office of state registration of marriage. This point is explained very simply - the registry office will not register people who are already married and do not have an official divorce. In addition, the registry office will not register people who are not capable of marriage (insane, sick), people who are closely related, people who have not reached marriageable age, who are forcibly forced into marriage. On my own behalf, I would like to note that the presence of a registration certificate for those getting married is a necessary measure. In part, this requirement is imposed on the church government agencies. In the time of our grandfathers, quite a lot of married couples were without official paper, and some couples manage to get married without state certificate and now (for example, if the priest knows you very well, and you plan to paint at the registry office after the wedding)

Who should not get married in the Church?

1. People who have been married more than 3 times. In church, the first time is considered the norm. The second time they get married in the Church is disapproved and a second marriage is allowed out of leniency towards human infirmities (the ritual itself changes somewhat, for example, crowns are not worn). They marry a third time in exceptional cases, if the reason is valid and the person has repented. No one will be married a fourth time - even widowhood after a third marriage does not give the right to marry a fourth time. State registration in this case, has no such restriction - and can register at least the sixth or seventh marriage;
2. To clergy, i.e. those who took holy orders. Marriage is possible only before ordination to the priesthood. A priest can only have one wife if he is a married priest. A monk cannot have a wife at all due to the vows he has taken. Violation of this rule threatens with deprivation of holy orders;
3. Monks and nuns, after taking their vows, are also not allowed to get married in the Church;
4. Guilty of the dissolution of a previous marriage. For example, a person guilty of adultery, which caused the dissolution of his first marriage, cannot enter into a new marriage;
5. For those who do not fall within certain age limits. On at the moment The lower age limit for a wedding should be considered the onset of civil majority (the age at which marriage is permitted in the registry office). Church marriage law also sets an upper limit for marriage: for men - 70 years, for women - 60 years;
6. An obstacle to marriage is the lack of consent on the part of the parents of the bride or groom. This type of obstacle should be considered only if the parents of the future spouses are Orthodox Christians. Children of Orthodox parents cannot marry willfully, without parental consent;
When receiving the blessing of the parents is impossible due to their unbelief, it is worth asking the blessing of the bishop to enter into a church marriage without the permission of the parents. The bishop has the right to bless a marriage even if the parents do not agree to the marriage of their children for illegal reasons.

Why don't they get married during Lent?

This is explained by the fact that during Lent, believers are supposed to attend divine services, and not have a wedding feast. Previously, only a wedding was called marriage, and the word “marriage” itself comes from the Slavic word “brashno”, translated meaning “feast” or “food”. Fasting is a time of abstinence, including marital abstinence. You are not supposed to visit places of entertainment during fasting - a person must cleanse himself morally during this time. If you look at the wedding calendar, there are more days in the year when weddings are not performed than days when weddings are allowed.
On the eve of the wedding, Orthodox Christians must fast; before the sacrament they should also attend the liturgy, confess and receive communion.

Remnants of paganism make themselves felt to this day, manifesting themselves in all sorts of fables and all kinds of superstitions. The word itself " superstition"(derived from “sue” - in vain and “faith”, literally translated as “vain belief”) - a prejudice representing belief in some otherworldly forces. There is, for example, a superstition that a ring that accidentally falls during a wedding or a wedding candle that goes out portends misfortune: divorce or early death one of the spouses. There is also a widespread superstition that the newlywed who first steps onto the spread towel will be the head of the family.
There is also a widespread superstition that you can’t get married in May, and from the older generation you even hear that in Kyiv (not to mention the villages or suburbs) you often hear “you’ll suffer for the rest of your life,” etc.
In general, there are a lot of superstitions regarding the wedding date. For example, the total number of weddings in leap year– drops noticeably, and this is due solely to superstitions. 2016 is a leap year and for some reason many people believe that it is not advisable to get married in such a year. The year that comes after the leap year 2017 is considered among our people to be the year of the Black Widow, which means again not good for marriage. So, we have a delusional situation in which two whole years out of four are considered unsuccessful for unknown reasons. Here is what the church says on this topic: “A “leap year” is a calendar year necessary for calculating exact astronomical dates. Therefore, people who consider a leap year to be unlucky for any business or undertaking (for example, marriage) fall into sin, because superstition lies in the fact that supernatural significance is attributed to natural objects. “The devil, trying to divert us from deeds of virtue and suppress spiritual jealousy, taught people to attribute happiness and unhappiness to days” (St. John Chrysostom)
Such fictions and superstitions should not worry a believer. And if you are taking such a step as getting married, you must be believers. Such accidents as the falling of a ring or the extinguishing of a candle should be treated precisely as accidents.

What to bring with you to the wedding

So, you have chosen a day and a time convenient for you has been assigned. In advance you will need to prepare:

1. Bottle of red wine (Cahors);

2. A small loaf or bread (left in the Church), not in all churches this is a mandatory item;

3. 2 candles, 5 towels (wedding set);

4. 4 handkerchiefs (two for witnesses to hold crowns and two for newlyweds to hold candles);

5. pair of icons: the Savior and the Mother of God

6. Rings (as a symbol of the eternity of marriage)

You will give the rings to the priest or his assistants, and they will be illuminated on the throne. You also give towels to your assistants before the wedding. Of the 5 towels, one should be large; it will be spread at your feet during the sacrament. A loaf or bread is placed on one, two more are placed on the icons with which you will leave the temple, and the last towel will be used to tie your hands during the Sacrament.

You must understand that not every church offers beautiful wedding candles and towels for them. Take care of this in advance; they can be purchased in large churches or Orthodox stores. Nowadays they sell ready-made, complete wedding sets, although in fact ordinary ones are also suitable for the sacrament church candles. All visible beauty is needed only for you and does not affect the amount of “grace” you will receive. The most important thing during a wedding is your prayer.

The splendor of the temple decoration - paintings on the walls, icons, professional choir and bell ringing upon completion - all this is needed to create a holiday, as well as wedding photographer, who, at your request, will photograph all this beautifully. I’ll also add on my own behalf that when taking photos or videos of a wedding, you need to take a blessing by asking permission in advance from the priest who will be marrying you. Photography is not prohibited, but the cameraman must be inconspicuous during the wedding and must not disturb anyone present. For example, when photographing a wedding, I don’t use flashes and shoot only with super-fast lenses and open apertures. Ordering wedding photo services– remember that a Wedding is primarily a sacrament, and not a photo shoot – and your photographer must be a professional.

Nowadays, everywhere the sacrament of wedding begins with betrothal. The engagement takes place closer to the entrance and only after it the couple enters the center of the temple. During the engagement, the priest gives the betrothed two lighted candles - a symbol of joy, warmth and purity. After this, he puts on the rings, the first one for the groom, then the second one for the bride, and three times (in the image of the Holy Trinity) he changes the rings on their hands.
After the young couple enters the temple, the priest asks whether the marriage is being performed of their own free will and desire. Next, three prayers are said, asking for God’s blessing on those getting married. Then the crowns are brought out (which are popularly called crowns, because they are always decorated like crowns) - and placed over the heads of the newlyweds. The crown is an image of the crown of the Kingdom of Heaven, and it is also a symbol of martyrdom. Life is never cloudless and simple, and in order to live it together to the end you need to have patience, comparable only to the patience of martyrs. In some churches, witnesses do not hold crowns over their heads, but rather put them on their heads.

The main moment of the wedding occurs when the priest blesses the newlyweds three times with the words: “Lord our God, I crown with Glory and Honor.” Then a cup of wine is brought out (the red wine in it is a symbol of the blood of Christ, and the cup itself is a symbol of the common cup of everyday joys and sorrows that spouses must share until the end of their lives). The priest gives the bride and groom to drink from the cup in three doses. Then he ties their hands with a towel and leads them around the table with icons three times, while the wedding choir sings. The circle is a symbol of eternity and continuity, because the sacrament is performed forever. Walking behind the priest is an image of serving the Church.
At the end, the priest gives the young people to kiss the cross and icons, and then hands the icons into their hands and speaks a short sermon - instructions. After the instruction, the newlyweds can kiss, and relatives and friends who came can come up and congratulate the young Christian family.

Only the ruling bishop of the diocese (region) where the wedding took place can dissolve a church marriage, and only in the event of infidelity by one of the spouses or for another serious reason (for example, the death of one of the spouses). “What God has joined together, let no man separate”

Wedding calendar for 2017 (allowed days are marked in pink)

Wedding calendar 2017 and 2018 were created for reference purposes and may contain unintentional inaccuracies; in addition, calendars do not take into account temple holidays of a particular church (in different temples this is different dates), before choosing a final date, be sure to consult with your priest in advance!

Wedding calendar for 2018 (pink cells are allowed days for weddings)

Video: On which days you can’t get married. Priest Igor Silchenkov

Video: The Sacrament of Wedding in the Russian Orthodox Church. Step by step instructions

General explanations: On which days can you get married and on which days can you not?

The Sacrament of Marriage is not performed:

Tuesday and Thursday - throughout the year;

On Saturday - throughout the year;

On the eve of the twelve, temple and great holidays;

During the Great, Petrov, Assumption and Nativity fasts;

On Meat Week, during Cheese Week (Maslenitsa) and on Cheese Week; during Easter (Light) Week;

On the days (and on the eve) of the Beheading of John the Baptist - September 11 and the Exaltation of the Holy Cross - September 27;

Also, the Sacrament of Wedding is not performed on the eve of patronal church feasts (each church has its own patronal feasts).

Holidays:

Twelfth, non-transitionable holidays:

Twelfth moving holidays for 2017:

Twelfth moving holidays for 2018:

Great Church holidays:

Church multi-day fasts in 2017:

Church multi-day fasts in 2018:

Solid weeks in 2017:

Cheese (Maslenitsa) – the week before Lent (without meat) from February 20 to February 25, 2017;

Solid weeks in 2018:

A week is a week from Monday to Sunday. These days there is no fasting on Wednesday and Friday. There are five continuous weeks:

The Publican and the Pharisee - begins 2 weeks before Lent from January 29 to February 3, 2018;

Cheese (Maslenitsa) – the week before Lent (without meat) from February 12 to February 17, 2018;

Church one-day fasts, days on which there is also no wedding: